I had an AMAZING time!!! This was my first excursion to Knott's in my over 3 years in good ol' L.A., and I have to thank the Truthbringer for making everything come together so wonderfully for one incredible night.
It was a little difficult to maneuver around the park with my wife (also known as the Cool Hot Chick) in a wheelchair from a nasty sprained ankle, but this did prove to be an added benefit to the experience, because we were able to be first in line for every maze and ride in the park! Some of the park patrons glared in pure hatred for our advantage, seeing as our group was about 14 people, and many times the greatest fear I had was being attacked by the people waiting in line! I could swear I heard one of them say "Let's kill 'em when they get off the ride." Geez...no sympathy for people in wheelchairs!
Each maze was great, but my favorite of all was "Malice in Wonderland," which was a psychedelic world of black lights, and twisted storybook imagery. It came with 3-D glasses and everything, and around every turn I was blown away at how cool the whole experience was. It was like a stoner’s worst nightmare!
As you can see from Truthbringer's review of ScreamFest L.A., I have the tendency to jump in my seat and crack people in the knees when I get scared! That's because I friggin' love getting scared! It's such a rush!!! I seek it out, like some sort of fetish. So during the night, I noticed that the park employee's dressed as monsters, creatures, etc. were doing their best to scare the living crap out of anyone who was even slightly afraid. I really wanted this to be me. I pictured an army of creatures stalking me in the fog, as I got that rush that I longed for. Unfortunately, they can sniff out someone like me. They knew I wanted it soooo badly. I would stand alone, reading a map, hoping that one would attack. I even leapt back at one particular monster when he walked past, and he looked at me, rolled his eyes, and spoke the words "yeah..." with a defeated sarcasm.
A few of my friends even specifically had a monster come after me on purpose as I tied my shoe, but as his face was inches from mine, I still didn't notice him and went about my business. DAMN! All I wanted was for someone to scare me!
Ah well.....I will prep myself for next year and I will practice for my "scared guy all alone" technique. Bring it on Knott's!
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NOTE FROM THE TRUTHBRINGER!
So you've read how we were almost brutally murdered and bludgoned to death because people in SoCal are unsympathetic in the least to anyone with a disability. Like a herd of gazelle when they have a wounded member, they will lead that liability to the lions! We need some snappy comebacks for next year when people give us shit if one of us should happened to be wheelchair bound again. Send in your lists to the Truthbringer.com Guestbook and we'll see who'se are the best.